When we talk about “empathetic leadership”, what do we really mean?
According to Fortune Magazine, the demand for “empathetic CEOs” is on the rise [1]. In other words, the world of work needs more leaders who care, and aren’t afraid to show it.
Empathy is often associated with compassion, but for me, it starts with connection – connecting with people on a human level. Not with their roles, job titles or projects.
When we build meaningful, authentic connections, we’re more tuned into the needs of those around us. Consequently, we’re able to go beyond passive understanding, and become better at recognising when to show compassion, express support and take action – all of which are essential to showing up as an empathetic leader.
By putting human connection at the heart of leadership, empathy becomes embedded in everything we say and do, no matter how big or small. Let me share an example.
In 2016, I worked at a Manchester-based PR agency called Tangerine. My Sheffield base meant a brutal commute in the pre-remote working era. I was working tremendously hard, trying to make my mark in a new role, while also grieving the recent loss of my mother.
One morning, I fell asleep on the train and missed my stop at Manchester Piccadilly. I woke up in Stockport, frantic, realising that I was going to be considerably late to a management training, which we’d been specifically asked to be prompt for, out of respect for our external guests.
Catching my breath, I messaged someone called Sam Gregory. Sam headed our B2B PR team and had organised the session.
Myriam: “Sam. I am so sorry. I fell asleep and missed my stop on the train from Sheffield. I am on my way back to Manchester now, but will be 30 minutes late. Really sorry.”
Sam: “Hey, please don’t worry about it. It happens to the best of us. Can’t wait for you to join us soon!”
My frazzled entry was marked by a big smile and a cheerful introduction to our guests from Sam.
Now Sam’s response may not seem extraordinary to many. But here’s why I think it is: Sam could have simply sent back a curt “OK” and carried on. It would have done the job. I would have still made it, albeit miserable, and spent the day overthinking the episode.
But she didn’t. In that moment, Sam chose to show support, and instead of making me feel just a little bit smaller, uplifted me, and changed how I showed up and engaged that day. She turned a negative, at best neutral, situation into a positive one by making an effort to alleviate my embarrassment and focus on moving forward.
The best thing about empathy is that it’s a choice – anyone can make it. The second best thing about it, is that it’s contagious. Sam’s approach during the brief time that we worked together influenced my own leadership style. It taught me to prioritise connecting with people, be mindful about how I respond to someone who may already be having a hard time, and to choose kindness. And you know what I’ve found? It costs nothing.
This is how, sometimes, even seemingly small acts of empathy can have a lasting impact.
This is the real business value of empathetic leadership.
Connect with Myriam on LinkedIn and X/Twitter.
Myriam was awarded a place on The Xec. Leadership Scheme for UK-based Black, Asian, Mixed Race, and Ethnic Minority PR and comms pros. She is part of the class of 2024. During her time on The Xec. she is being mentored by Armand David.
[1] The empathetic executive: Top headhunters are turning away from cutthroat leaders and looking for CEOs with better soft skills, 16 November 2023, Accessed 21 January 2024, https://fortune.com/2023/11/16/ceo-empathy-self-awareness-top-recruiters-soft-skills/
